Game Report: Dublin A vs Irn Bruisers 5.11.16

It would be safe to say that the Irn Bruisers found their game in Ireland on Saturday challenging. The prediction beforehand was for a Dublin win, and they stamped their mark on the game from the very start.

Devil's Advoskate tricked by a wily Dublin jammer; photo courtesy of Alastair McAleese.

Devil's Advoskate tricked by a wily Dublin jammer; photo courtesy of Alastair McAleese.

Dublin A established a big lead early on, with the scoreline sitting at 63-0 in their favour early in the first half. Glasgow fought back to stick some points on the board but Dublin certainly didn't make it easy for them, 131-16. The Bruisers struggled onwards for every point, and ended the first half with the score 172-27 to the home team.

With their opponents sitting in a dominant position after the break, it was all uphill in the second half for the Bruisers. They dug in and managed to sneak some more points past Dublin A, but for every point the Bruisers squeezed out of them the Irish skaters piled on even more and early in the second half the scores were 228-49. Despite our skaters' best efforts, the home team pulled further and further ahead and won comfortably.

Sarah McMillan fighting through the Dublin blockers; photo courtesy of Alastair McAleese.

Sarah McMillan fighting through the Dublin blockers; photo courtesy of Alastair McAleese.

Final score: Dublin A 401 - 75 GRD Irn Bruisers

Irn Bruisers MVP: Lindsey Watson 40

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This was the Irn Bruisers last game of the season, and they're now taking a month break from training before getting back on it in December to come back stronger in 2017. Watch this space for more news on planned events for next year.

For your next roller derby fix, why not come along to our Home Teams Final on Saturday? First-time finalists the T-Wrecks will be facing last year's winners the Bad Omens to see who will be crowned champions - go here for more information and to book your tickets!

GRD: A year in the life

Recently GRD held our Annual General Meeting at Euro Hostel Glasgow. At this meeting the Board of Directors reported to our league members on the business of the club over the past year, followed by a financial report and information on the business of each of our committees. This year with the assistance of our Web and Design committee the Directors showed us a wonderful slideshow of some of our triumphs and challenges which took place between September 2015 and 2016. 

Here at the blog we thought our readers might like to share in this little trip down memory lane, so grab yourself a cuppa and take a gander at what we've been up to!

Game Report: Newcastle Canny Belters vs Irn Bruisers 10.9.16

It was one sunny September morning when a bunch of tough women in yellow hopped in the back of a minibus, drove to England and turned left towards that haven of brown ale, black & white stripes and people unfamiliar with outerwear. We'll gloss over how long ago it was because Team Blog have clearly been neglecting their duties due to being on important business...in Zurich. Or something like that.

The Bruisers last met the Canny Belters on home ground back in February, as part of the British Championships Tier 1 tournament which was so successfully hosted in part by GRD. That game ended in a win for the visitors, with the scoreline 109-238 in the Canny Belter's favour. So the Irn Bruisers had it all to play for, but would the Belter's home ground advantage prove too much for them?

Sarah McMillan skipping up the inside line to avoid a hit from Anita B Nasty; photo courtesy of Dave Moore.

Sarah McMillan skipping up the inside line to avoid a hit from Anita B Nasty; photo courtesy of Dave Moore.

The Irn Bruisers line up has seen a lot of flux in recent months, though there are plenty of familiar faces. Despite putting up a fierce fight, it just wasn't enough against an incredibly strong Newcastle team and the home team took the win.

Final score: Newcastle Canny Belters 261 - 96 GRD Irn Bruisers

Bruise Missile fighting to get past the fierce defences of Missy Pow Pow; photo courtesy of Dave Moore.

Bruise Missile fighting to get past the fierce defences of Missy Pow Pow; photo courtesy of Dave Moore.

Game Report: Winterfell WItches vs Quantum Leap & Vagine Regime vs Soy Division

We've been a bit quiet on the game front since our league summer break and that ill-fated day in Edinburgh, but never fear for this Saturday GRD played host to not one but two wonderful games of roller derby. I'm even going to tell you about them!

First of all, however, you should know that this Saturday, the Maiden Grrders will be up in Aberdeen to take on Tier 4 North champions, Granite City Roller Derby's Northern Fights. For more information, check out the Facebook event. We'd love to see you there! And if you can't make that, check out our Events Calendar for an upcoming Irn Bruisers game in Newcastle, the continuation of our Home Teams Season and a wee musical fundraiser featuring that tiny blur on rollerskates, Jess E Ska.

Poster for the Pride weekend doubleheader, photo courtesy of Claire Brand.

Poster for the Pride weekend doubleheader, photo courtesy of Claire Brand.

Game 1: Quantum Leap (Team Science) vs Winterfell Witches (Team Magic/fantasy)

Since ancient times there has been tension between the rational, enlightened forces of science and the mysterious, otherworldly powers of magic. What better way to figure out who's right than a game of roller derby? Featuring mixed-level skaters from GRD, Auld Reekie Roller Girls, Ayrshire Roller Derby, Doonhame Roller Derby, and Mean City Roller Derby, including some newbies (here's looking at you, Fock Her, Fury L Spark and Poe Slameron!), we took to quad skates to decide the matter once and for all.

Wands were drawn, test tubes rattled and we were soon under way with not much to tell between the fantastical creatures and number-crunching boffins for the first few jams. Soon, however, either the fumes or some fairy curse must have got to our trusty nerds and the wizarding wonders started to pull ahead. By half time the score was 158-62 in favour of the magicians.

The white-coated wonders reapplied their safety goggles while the wily witches brought out their brooms and the whistle denoting the start of the second half was blown. Everyone's favourite defenders of reason fought valiantly FOR SCIENCE! but their devilish opponents were just as determined. Ultimately the Westerosi gave Quantum Leap's geeks a massive wedgie and stole their dinner money (which, given the usual consequence of failure in Westeros, means they got off lightly tbh).

Scientists Stargrazer & Bambo taking on the magical Jess Little. Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy, boutday.com.

Scientists Stargrazer & Bambo taking on the magical Jess Little. Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy, boutday.com.

Final score: Quantum Leap 121 - 319 Winterfell Witches

So it would appear that Santa is real, the Easter Bunny exists and all that nonsense about quantum physics was dreamed up by some bored lab techs after ingesting too much of something mind-altering.

Awards:

Quantum Leap
Best Blocker: Velosidy 16
Best Jammer: Fury L Spark 64
MVP: Fury Eyes Only 007

Winterfell Witches
Best Blocker: Sadie O'Hades 311
Best Jammer: Hardcore 24
MVP: Jess Little 7

Game 2: Vagine Regime vs Soy Division

Rumour has it that there was a rainbow in Glasgow on Saturday, and its end was at the ARC sports centre. It's either that or we had Vagine Regime to visit on the day of the Glasgow Pride march and they brought the most spectacular multi-coloured helmet covers you ever did see, in an attempt to dazzle their plant-powered opponents, Soy Division.

It was also lovely to see and hear the fantastic Jeneral Strike and her new bionic limb, as one half of a formidable announcing partnership with fellow Irn Bruiser Siobhan Sinclair.

In the first jam, Vagine Regime's captain Inky Minx showed that she meant business and took lead jammer status, calling it for four points. Sarah McMillan for Soy made it out of the pack first in the following jam but a no pass/no penalty call allowed VR's Hoots to become lead and she took full advantage, with the score 12-8 in VR's favour by the time she called it. Both teams experimented with their tactics to find their opponent's weaknesses, with some lovely offence off the jam line from VR. The third jam saw SD pull ahead due to a power jam, with Hazzard jamming to end it 16-17 to Soy.

Wrath and Rosie Peacock with their eyes on the prize while Sarah McMIllan sneaks by for some offense. Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy, boutday.com.

Wrath and Rosie Peacock with their eyes on the prize while Sarah McMIllan sneaks by for some offense. Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy, boutday.com.

Unfortunately, an illegal star pass saw Phoenix sent to the penalty box for SD at the end of the following jam and VR's Catashtrophe capitalised, pulling ahead to end the fifth jam 55-17 to VR. Soy fought back hard, with some tactical calls to reduce the damage from VR and some lovely defensive walls including a powerful Phoenix/Collie combo that troubled Catashtrophe for some time.

Some really strong jamming from VR mixed with powerful blocking allowed them to pull ahead further across the first half, though that isn't to say that Soy were passive. A cracking apex jump from Soy's captain Sable, while VR's Rosie Peacock watched wistfully from the penalty box, made the audience sit up and pay attention but the points just kept coming for our en-rainbowed guests. Each team called for an official review but not even Soy's upheld review was able to turn the tide for them.

Despite some clever play, VR stretched out their lead over the first half, ending it 141-56 to VR.

Pumped up on kale and equal rights respectively, Soy and VR meant business in the first jam of the second half. With Catashtrophe jamming for VR and Postlewaight for Soy, Rosie Peacock saw the opportunity for a punishing offense and pulled the Soy jammer back, meanwhile Inky Minx did some good work to let her jammer sail past the opposition. The jam ended with Catashtrophe racking up an impressive 31 points, leaving it at 172-56.

VR kept the pressure on and pulled further ahead. By the end of the twelfth jam, which saw Sarah McMillan take lead jammer over Rosie Peacock with some lovely footwork up the outside line, the score stood at 193-78 with Soy's chances of clawing it back disappearing by the moment. At this point, VR called a team timeout which gave everyone a chance to collect their thoughts.

Clearly whatever was said to VR during the timeout did the trick and they became even more dominant. During jam 14, Catashtrophe managed to score an impressive 44 points surely pulling VR into an insurmountable lead with 241 points to Soy's 79. In jam 18, Soy managed to break the 100-point barrier with a Sarah McMillan jam featuring an apex jump described by the announcers as 'beautiful'.

Not to be outdone, VR send Rosie Peacock on in the very next jam in which she is noted to perform some interpretive dance before a huge hit and recycle to wear down the jammer, Sable. Presumably confused as to whether she was actually playing roller derby or featuring in some avant garde Fringe show, Sable passed the panty to Sylk but the jam came to an end almost immediately with the score 258-104.

In jam 23, the last of the game, Sable and Catashtrophe line up together behind the jam line once more. Catashtrophe plays a bit of fifth blocker to hold the Soy jammer at bay while giving time for the two VR blockers to get out of the penalty box, and then she disappears into the distance with a magnificent backwards spin through the pack. She makes it look easy, breeazing past some really brilliant defence and at the final whistle Vagine Regime's victory is confirmed.

Final score: Vagine Regime 291 - 108 Soy Division

A veritable rainbow of officials, both on- and off-skates. Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy, boutday.com.

A veritable rainbow of officials, both on- and off-skates. Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy, boutday.com.

If you were in attendance you may have noticed something a little unusual about our referees and NSOs (more than normal, I mean). For one day only our zebras and flamingoes eschewed their standard colours and went more than a little bit rainbow in honour of Pride - and they looked fantastic! Thanks, as always, to every single one of them as without them these games couldn't happen.

Awards:

Vagine Regime
Best Blocker: Slappedash 190
Best Jammer: Catashtrophe 663
MVP: Rosie Peacock 50

Soy Division
Best Blocker: Drama Bomb 000
Best Jammer: Sarah McMillan 7
MVP: Sable v20

I would also like to thank everyone who came along to give us their support, all of our volunteers whose hard work made the day run smoothly and the EMTs who are always on hand with a smile and some expert first aid skills as needed.

Game Report: ARRG Allstars vs GRD Irn Bruisers

Yesterday the Irn Bruisers went through to the Meadowbank Sports Centre in Edinburgh to visit our friends and rivals Auld Reekie. The first game of the day saw ARRG's new All Star Rookies (ASTROs) take to the track against Dundee's Bonnie Colliders. The game finished with a very respectable win for Dundee, final score ARRG 166-220 DRG. 

After a short intermission GRD's Irn Bruisers took to the jam line against ARRG's All Stars. Unfortunately a few minutes into the first half one of our skaters suffered an injury on track and the game was stopped while she received medical assistance. Shortly afterwards it was decided that the game would be called off while the skater was seen to. 

Despite our best efforts with protective gear and high health and safety standards occasionally accidents do happen simply due to the full contact nature of the sport. We wish our Jeneral Strike a full and speedy recovery, and we would also like to thank ARRG, the officials, the EMTs and bout day crew who helped deal with a difficult situation calmly and professionally. 

Although injuries can occur from time to time days like today remind us that we are all one big family in roller derby. This is a sport where friends can compete against each other at the highest level and yet remain caring and encouraging; any rivalries on track disappear when that final whistle blows.

We don't have any pictures to show you from the early parts of the game today so instead here is a picture shared with us by GRD's own Hateball of the first GRD team to take on ARRG in 2009

Glasgow Roller Girls' Irn Bruisers, 2009.

Glasgow Roller Girls' Irn Bruisers, 2009.

We're sure we'll see our neighbours from Auld Reekie back on track soon and can't wait to take them on! In the mean time, skate hard and take care of each other.

#ThrowbackThursday : Riots Of Spring

The sport of roller derby is constantly evolving - from its start in the roller marathons of the 1880s, to a more recognisable contact sport on roller skates in the 1930s, to the game we play today. The WFTDA rules set is constantly updated to improve the game (and to give me the fear every time our annual rules test comes round, I suspect). Even the language we use has changed: they're not bouts any more, we play games and we're no longer the Glasgow Roller Girls, we're Glasgow Roller Derby.

It occurred to me that it would be good to have a look back through GRD's past, and for my first in this series of nostalgic posts I've jumped way back to a time of themed bouts, fishnets and mini-kilts: GRG's first ever bout on March 29 2008.

The poster for the Riots of Spring bout between London Rollergirls and Glasgow Roller Girls, 29 March 2008.

The poster for the Riots of Spring bout between London Rollergirls and Glasgow Roller Girls, 29 March 2008.

At that time, we were a one-team league and the Irn Bruisers made the long trip down south to face up to London Brawling. It was a tough game against a more experienced side and ended in defeat for the Bruisers (featuring some guest skaters from Birmingham Blitz Dames, Central City Rollergirls and London Roller Girls) with a final score of 163-31 to Brawling. While it wasn't a happy ending, I'm sure it was a great learning experience and I love that LRG's bout report includes comment on the band, Earl Grey & The Tea Ladies, who played at half time!

Something else which has changed: these days we just give awards to the Best Jammer, Best Blocker and MVP but back in the day we also celebrated Penalty Queen (it really is what it sounds like!) - Bette Noir for LRG and Jaci Dodger for GRG.

This is to be the first in an ongoing series of blog posts on GRD history - I've only just started digging and have struck gold with some absolutely brilliant old photos, videos and posters - so keep checking back for more!

If future events are more your thing, check out our Events Page to see what's coming up.