5 x 5 : 5th Blocker's 5th Birthday event! 19.11.16

It feels like it's been there forever but, if it were a person, it would just be starting school and would probably still need help tying its shoelaces. 5th Blocker Skates, run by our very own Marshall Lawless, came into being at the end of 2011 and is celebrating its 5th birthday in style this coming weekend!

Haberbashery & Marshall Lawless on the 5th Blocker steps waaaaaaay back at the start.

This Saturday, skaters from all over will be converging on the Arc in Glasgow for a day of scrimmages, followed by a karaoke party at Garnethill Multicultural Centre in the evening. There will be PRIZES and stalls, including a 5th Blocker one featuring sizing stock from many suppliers. For more details check out the event page here.

A Glasgow landmark for roller derby addicts, 5th Blocker also has an online shop for all your quad skate needs here. You can contact them for advice or information on stock, and if you pop into the store there's always someone on hand with knowledgeable advice on all things roller derby. As their leaflet says, you just can't be sad on rollerskates!

Stefanie Mainey of London Roller Girls popped in for a visit while she was up to run the GRD bootcamp earlier in the year.

If you've been inspired by all this talk of roller skates, and are looking for something new to do in the New Year, we've set the date for our next Glasgow Roller Recruits new skater intake: 8th January. Get it in your diaries, get those resolutions written, and we'll follow up sooooon with more information!

Game Report: Home Teams FINAL 2016!

Saturday saw the exciting culmination of our 2016 Home Teams season with the mighty T-Wrecks taking on the brilliant Bad Omens for one final showdown. 

As you'll know if you read our game preview in their previous match up the dinosaurs took the win over the crazy crows with a commanding 50 point differential. While this was a promising start it was still all to play for going into this last home game.

In the green shirts, the T-WRECKS!

12 Killer Bee
14 Shona Mercy (c)
15 Lynsey O’Reilly
202 R2 Deck You - our Special Guest Skater from Ayrshire Roller Derby!
24 Puma Thurman
25 Phylocoraptor
3 Mad Natter
350 Devil’s Advoskate
5 Tequila SlamHer
7 Sarah McMillan
823 Cara Viola
97 Nitrojen
Bench manager: SubMarine

The 2016 TWrecks finalists!
Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy of Boutday.com

And in the red, the Bad Omens!

03 Shorty McLightningpants
10 Sarah McGettigan
168 Janie Bones
20 Penny Pinch'er
2244 Tesla Recoil
311 Sadie O'Hades
413 Katie Toerag
55 Spin Diesel
59 Hadrian's Brawl
730 Fever
85 Stargrazer
93 Crash Test Barbie
Bench manager: Jodie

The Bad Omens in the 2016 final. 
Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy of Boutday.com.

The game began with veteran skaters Shorty McLightningpants and Sarah McMillan on the jam line. Both teams fielding strong Bruisers showed that neither was afraid to put strong skates forward in this face off. After a few short sharp tactical call offs, the Bad Omens led 58-1 in the first half. The TWrecks were not giving up so easily though, even fielding long-time Dino and usual blocker Devil's Advoskate who grabbed lead to help them pinch back some points from the claws of the crows. Before long it's BO 89 - 31 TW thanks to some lovely apex jumps from McMillan, although it still wasn't enough to fend off the mighty Omens who ended the half with a sizeable lead, BO 144 - 64 TW.

The dinos came roaring back on track with ferocious determination, combining the might of established Bruisers, experienced Maidens and even some excellent newly bout ready skaters like Killer Bee, who skated hard and turned left with the best of them on this Saturday afternoon. However the Bad Omens' will would not be broken and before long they broke the 200 point mark with a score of BO 221 - 86 TW. Ahead of the final jams the Wrecks took another blow as Shona Mercy was sent to the penalty box for the seventh and final time, fouling out of the rest of the game. Despite their hard work and strong challenges the T-Wrecks just couldn't beat the defending champs, and so another final was won by the most dastardly Home Team of all, the Bad Omens!

Final score: BO 304 - 133 TW

Awards were given out for notable performances throughout the game in tried and tested fashion:

BAD OMENS
Best Jammer: Sarah McGettigan #10
Best Blocker: Janie Bones #168
Most Valuable Player: Spin Diesel #55

T-WRECKS
Best Jammer: Puma Thurman #24
Best Blocker: Cara Viola #823
MVP: Devil's Advoskate #350

GRD would like to thank all the skaters, officials, events staff and guests who made this Home Teams season possible. We'd also like to thank our wonderful sponsors EuroHostel and 5th Blocker Skates for their support throughout this season.

If you've been inspired by the action you saw on track during Home Teams this year, why not come along and learn to skate with the Glasgow Roller Recruits? Our next intake starts on Sunday 8th January 2017 at the Arc Sports Centre in Glasgow. All the details can be found here. See you there!

Tesla Recoil and Killer Bee think you should join us at the new GRR intake in January and become the next generation of awesome skaters at GRD. See you there... OR ELSE!
Photo courtesy of Neil Mackinnon. 

Game Preview: Raaaawrs versus kakaaaaws!

It's a clash of the titans! It's the game to end all games (or at least our Home Teams Season)! It's green versus red, prehistoric versus supernatural, dinos versus crows, raaaawrs versus kakaaaaws.... 

In the green corner: the CHALLENGERS, The T-WRECKS! Headed up this year by captains Shona Mercy and Jeneral Strike, the green machines have had a stellar season winning against both other Home Teams in the tournament with a healthy score of 220-135 against the Bad Omens in June. This reporter caught up with fellow blogsmith and diehard dino Puma Thurman to discuss the Wrecks' chances of making mincemeat out of the opposition on Saturday:

There have been some changes in the squad since the first HT event this year, most notably the absence of our beloved co-captain Strike (off hopping around Europe as we speak)! But we've got determination, a good influx of new blood and momentum behind us. We may have tiny useless arms but that's an advantage for forearms penalties and we've already survived several million years so we're ready to make it three out of three wins and stomp those pesky crows! 

The T-Wrecks after defeating the Death Stars in June. Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy of Boutday.com.

And in the red corner: the reigning CHAMPS, the BAD OMENS!

Having won five out of six of the previous Home Teams seasons here at Glasgow the buoyant crows are feeling cocky going into this final match up. Fever and Janie Bones have been leading the charge for the Omens this season; Bones had this to say when we asked for a few words before heading into Saturday's showdown:

We had a bit of a shaky start at the beginning of the season with a loss to the Wrecks, but the team have worked hard and smashed our way into the final. We're going to be strong and together and make the T-Wrecks extinct! KAKAW!

The Bad Omens crowing after winning their game against the Death Stars in October. Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy of Boutday.com.

Two fierce teams. One last match up. Who will win? One thing's for sure, this is a game not to be missed! Tickets are a mere £6 in advance from our events page, or £8 on the door. 

When T-Wrecks met Bad Omens back in June the dinos won the day. But who will take home the trophy in the final?! Photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy of Boutday.com.

T-Wrecks Fundraiser

It may seem like a long time ago now but bloggers are much like squirrels and we've been mostly asleep/burying nuts under trees since the end of September. (This sounds like a lie - Ed).

Which is why you haven't seen a write-up of the fantastic fundraising gig organised by our very own T-Wrecks and hosted by Audio. Until now.

Event poster, created by Jess E Ska. 

First up was Jonzip, described on his website as a "solo acoustic punk". He was in 70s punk band, The Zips, and has recently struck out on his own with folk/punk/protest music and we were in for a treat.

Jonzip on stage with Jess E Ska. 

He was followed by The Superlatives, who are made up of three guys from Wetherby and play music with obvious punk/indie/alternatives influences. Full of energy, they grabbed the attention and didn't let it drop for a second!

The Superlatives. 

And last but not least were Glaswegian nine-piece ska collective, Esperanza. Featuring ex-GRD skater Jess E Ska, they soon had everyone up dancing and by the end no-one wanted it to be over. I'm fairly certain I've expended less energy during intense gym sessions than some of those skanking, pogoing and generally throwing themselves about!

Esperanza in action - for video, head on over to our Instagram @wearegrd

The event raised over £300. We would like to thank the venue, the bands, everyone who came along and had a wonderful time and everyone else involved in making it such a success!

If this has whetted your appetite for more Home Teams action, why not come along on 12th November to see the T-Wrecks face up to the Bad Omens in our Home Teams Final?! Tickets and more info here.

Dublin A vs Irn Bruisers - 5.11.16

Remember, remember the 5th of November (which isn't hard as it's only in two days time as I write this, and even my attention span isn't that short) - our Irn Bruisers are taking a short trip over the sea to face up to Dublin Roller Derby's A Team.

The teams last played each other two years ago, 8th November 2014, when the Bruisers dominated the game with the score 118-29 at half time, and the Irn Bruisers taking the win 249-82.

The Irn Bruisers about to face up to Dublin A back in 2014; image courtesy of Dave McAleavy boutday.com

Our team has seen a lot of change in recent times, with a number of notable departures but also plenty of new talent. Over at the Scottish Roller Derby blog, they're predicting an Irish victory and certainly that's what the current stats would support. They have eleven members on the Team Ireland training squad and have had a pretty strong season, but our Irn Bruisers won't make it easy for them. We've got plenty of fight and we're packing it all with our skates, safety gear and clean underwear ready for the weekend.

Some of the action from the last time GRD met DRD; photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy boutday.com 

The game starts at 1pm, and will be live-tweeted from @DRDscores so if you can't be there onthe day you can keep up to date with all the action. Hey ho GLASGOW!

GRD: A year in the life

Recently GRD held our Annual General Meeting at Euro Hostel Glasgow. At this meeting the Board of Directors reported to our league members on the business of the club over the past year, followed by a financial report and information on the business of each of our committees. This year with the assistance of our Web and Design committee the Directors showed us a wonderful slideshow of some of our triumphs and challenges which took place between September 2015 and 2016. 

Here at the blog we thought our readers might like to share in this little trip down memory lane, so grab yourself a cuppa and take a gander at what we've been up to!

Halloween Queeriosity

Once upon an evening dreary, while you pondered, weak and weary,

Over many a quaint and curious Pinterest costume inspo board --

While you nodded, nearly sleeping, suddenly your phone went beeping,

And to your feet you went a-leaping, leaping in delight and awe.

"Tis Queeriosity!" you shrieked, "with DJ Future Fight and more! --

Only he can fill the floor!"

Poster for Halloween Queeriosity 2016; artwork courtesy of Nuclaire Art. 

Quoth the Raven "there will be cheap drinks and prizes for the best costumes - for more info see the Events Page."

Apologies to Mr Poe for this one, who I suspect is spinning in his grave. Which is very in the spirit of Halloween, I guess.

Game Report: Why So Sirius? at FVRG's Harry Potter Sur5al Tournament

Merlin's beard, did you hear about the magnificent Harry Potter Sur5al Tournament that our friends over at Fierce Valley Roller Girls hosted recently? It was a MAGICAL day!

For those who reckon they know the rules of roller derby but are not familiar with this particular format, a Sur5al tournament differs from our standard game in a few significant ways: 

• Each team is made up of five players instead of the usual fourteen. This means every skater is on track for every jam!
• Each team plays every other team taking part in the tournament once for a single jam. There were ten teams taking part in this tournament so it meant we all played nine jams.
• Lead Jammer status can be awarded to the first jammer legally out the pack but they may not call off the jam early, it must run for the full two minutes.
• Teams gain five points for a win, two for a draw, and zero for a loss. It was also possible to gain one additional point for earning Lead Jammer status. 
• If any skaters foul out of the tournament their team continues with as few as four or three skaters, but any less than that and they will be forced to forfeit their remaining games. 
• The team with the most points at the end of the tournament WINS! 

FVRG pulled out all the stops and got the Ministry of Magic involved in their events team to ensure the day went off without a hitch. The witches and wizards of the NSO team were dressed in their Hogwarts House finery with jam timers announcing "Five seconds!" with a swish of their wands. Butterbeer and Polyjuice potion were available at the cake stall and even the vendors got involved with magical artefacts from Notebook as well as FVRG's own Maxx Attack and FunGhoul's (witch)crafty goods. "Sweet quaffle!" I hear you cry. But that wasn't all! There was also some bewitching  ROLLER DERBY to thrill and entertain throughout the afternoon.

Just like a normal quidditch match this was a co-ed tournament and so most teams featured more than one gender - in fact team Why So Sirius? from GRD were the only all female team taking part. Skaters from as many as twelve Scottish teams skated and most gave themselves Potter-tastic names, including Neville Wears Prada, Snitches and Bitches, the Nameless Ones and Snapes on a Plane. Many skaters renamed themselves for the occasion too - personal favourites were Luna Shovegood, J K Fouling, Ron Weavesley, Hustlepuff, and HARMione Grinder! 

But don't let the fun names befuddle you, when the teams got on track the action was as fast as a Firebolt and as hard-hitting as a Hippogriff. Neville Wears Prada took an early lead and remained undefeated throughout the tournament - no Felix Felicis was allowed on the premises, they did this all through pure skill! - and so with the Galleon podium taken care of the hotly contested spots were second and third as the Slytherwins and Golden Snatches battled it out for the Sickle and Knut, each winning seven of their nine jams.

The final scores on the board when all snitches were recaptured. Image courtesy of Sam Skipsey.

Team Why So Sirius came ninth out of ten and had a glorious time playing such fantastic competitors. For three of us this was our first co-ed experience and all had a really great time skating against friends and neighbours from local leagues. No matter what the scores on the board every single team came off track amid masses of high fives and hugs. Not a single Unforgivable Curse was uttered because the level of sportspersonship was so high! 

Individual awards were as follows:

Tournament Best Blocker: Gibb (Bairn City Rollers)
Tournament Best Jammer: Momo (Granite City Brawlers)
Tournament MVP: Kami-Tazzy (Granite City Roller Derby)

We would like to thank FVRG for hosting such a Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Tournament and would award them the top grade of O for Outstanding! The organisation on the lead up and the care taken on the day far Exceeded Expectations. We'd also like to thank all the Officials, Ministry of Magic staff, announcers, photographers, and everyone else involved for making it such an enjoyable experience.

Mischief Managed! 

Game Report: Home Teams 2

You might remember the first event in this year's GRD Home Teams calendar, back in June. The T-Wrecks took on the Bad Omens and Death Stars and those giant green guys with pointy teeth and tiny arms were victorious! Twice! Turns out being extinct for several million years is no barrier to being successful at roller derby. If you want all the prehistoric detail, check out the blog.

The end of September saw the Bad Omens and the Death Stars finally getting their chance to fight it out, to see whether magical powers and brooms or lightsabers and something which definitely isn't a moon were the best.

Fever showing Postlewaight her magical flying smashy roller derby powers; photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy boutday.com.

It was a pretty tense game, with a tight margin between the teams throughout and multiple lead changes to keep the crowd on the edge of their seats. At half time, there were only five points in it with Death Stars in the lead 102-107.

Monifa, Belle & Lawless holding back Hadrian's Brawl; photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy boutday.com.

While the Force was strong with our local Sith Lords, any portents of doom for the Bad Omens would have been premature. They appeared to cast a spell over the opposition and created gold from base metal - finishing the game as diabolically good winners.

Final score: Bad Omens 236 - 227 Death Stars.

Despite spending much of the game reclining, the Bad Omens still romped to victory; photo courtesy of Dave McAleavy boutday.com.

The final event in our home teams' season this year will be on November 12th, with a game between the Bad Omens and T-Wrecks to see who will bathe in glory and who will bathe in gravy (or something). Get your tickets here.

Game Report: Maiden Grrders at Great Yorkshire Showdown 17.9.16

One Saturday back in September, before the crack of dawn, the Maiden Grrders slithered out of bed and tried to convince themselves that being awake before 6am was good for them and character-building and wouldn't lead to serious long-term health issues. Except for bench manager Silvie Postlewaight who was up at 04:30 making guacamole because she's clearly some sort of statistical outlier or alien hybrid.

The reason behind the early rise was a longer-than-expected road trip to Halifax, of which a good proportion was spent navigating roadworks somewhere in Lanarkshire. We entertained ourselves with a Best Onesie contest (there were TWO Totoros!) and a hard-fought Harry Potter quiz. Our bus driver was a total trooper and we cannot thank him enough for delivering everyone safely and just about in time for the Great Yorkshire Showdown.

Mad Natter, NitroJen & Sadie O'Hades waiting for the offense; photo courtesy of Roller Derby on Film.

The tournament, organised by Leeds Roller Dolls, saw six teams facing off to be ultimate champions: our Maiden Grrders, Halifax Bruising Banditas, Hereford Horror Bulls, Hot Wheel B Team, Manchester Roller Derby's Furies and Leeds' Whip-Its. In the group stage, the teams all played each other in thirty-minute games and the victor in each group went on to a final full-length game to decide the overall winner.

The Maidens' first game was against Halifax Bruising Banditas and was tough, to say the least. Our skaters were not long off the bus and only really started to get into their stride in the second half. They fought valiantly but sadly, that wasn't enough and they lost.

Final score: GRD Maiden Grrders 24 - 187 Halifax Bruising Banditas.

Stinger Belle & Penny Pinch'er holding back the Halifax jammer; photo courtesy of Roller Derby on FIlm.

After a brief respite while our opponents played each other, the Maidens were soon back on track to face up to the Hereford Horror Bulls. It was another hard game for GRD but they retained more control than the first and were able to put some more points past the opposition. Despite some great team work, they were again defeated but learned a lot from their experience and they'll be putting that all to good use in the future.

Final score: GRD Maiden Grrders 68 - 125 Hereford Roller Girls.

Spin Diesel on the jam line while our blockers are ready for the Hereford jammer; photo courtesy of Roller Derby on Film.

The final was played between Halifax Bruising Banditas and Leeds Whip-Its, with Halifax taking the tournament title.

We'd like to thank the organisers and all the teams, officials and other support staff who made the day possible!